Tuesday, August 10, 2004

The Terrorist Cat!

This is the official story about the mysterious cat (Macavity, anyone?):

The SN Brussels flight from the Belgian capital to Vienna, Austria, had been in the air about 20 minutes Monday when "it was noticed" that a passenger's pet had escaped from its cage, "although it is not yet clear how," according to an airline statement.
"Once free, the animal proceeded to wander around the cabin," slipping into the cockpit when meals were being delivered to the two-man flight crew, it said.
"At this stage the animal became agitated and nervous," it said. An airline spokeswoman added that the cat scratched the copilot's arm.
The pilot decided to return to Brussels as a precaution, and the 58 passengers departed once more two hours later on another flight.

Is this the real story? Decide for yourselves:

A cat identified as Al-Garfield Mahmud Allawi, escaped his cage in a Belgium Airliner, pretended to go to the restroom in the front of the airplane, and then entered the pilot's cabin and proceeded to attack him.

"It looked like he was trying to take over the airplane." Stated the pilot of the airplane, "All I saw was this cat coming at me. He kept saying 'meowjiad meowjiad'. I didn't understand at first what he was trying to say. Then it clicked. He was saying Jihad! Jihad!. I wrestled the cat to the ground and took control of the situation."

The airliner had to quickly turn around and come back to the Brussels International Airport where Belgium security forces along with the FBI and CIA where waiting there to apprehend the terrorist cat.

"I had no idea what to expect." Stated an FBI official, "I had no clue that Al-Qaeda was now using animals to do their dirty deeds."

As it turns out, Al-Garfield Mahmud Allawi is an American out of work cat actor who grew frustrated with Hollywood and moved to Afghanistan during the 1980's and joined Al-Qaeda.

"I was sick and tired of the American way of life." Stated Al-Garfield Mahumd Allawi, "It's all about being skinny, famous, rich and materialistic. I needed to get more spiritual. So I went to Afghanistan and there I learned the truth about you American pigs. That is why I wanted to help the cause. I volunteered to become a martyr. I want to go to heaven with my 73 virgin cats."

Check the picture of Al-Garfield in the second link, too. Of course this is all very questionable humor, but what wouldn't I do for the cat lovers among my readers...

Thanks to msCJ for the links.