Saturday, December 27, 2003

Some Gentle Humor For The New Year

Democrats are a gloomy bunch, I've been told. It has to do with having a bleeding heart and a conscience, some say. Others think that it's the natural consequence of the twilight world some democrats have drifted into after trying to persuade themselves of being just the same as Republicans except not. I think that it's caused by having to listen to too much Ann Coulter and Bill O'Riley and Rush Limbaugh.

So here's an antidote, a vaccination against gloominess in the forthcoming election year:

"The elephant is the perfect symbol for Republicans: they never forget, lead
each other around by the tail, and think everyone should work for peanuts."

"Republicans are good for one thing: getting elected every 30 or 40 years so
people can be reminded how terrible they are." - Bob Shrum

"The Religious Right scares the *hell* out of me." - Sen. Barry Goldwater
(R-AZ, ret.)

"If the Republicans will stop telling lies about the Democrats, we will stop
telling the truth about them." - Adlai Stevenson (1900-1965)

"The Republican Convention opened with a prayer. If the Lord can see his way
to bless the Republican Party the way it's been carrying on, the the rest of
us ought to get it without asking." - Will Rogers, 1928

Republican Health Care Plan: marry a Canadian.

The GOP: "A rising tide lifts all yachts."

"You *must* have that child...so we can starve it!" -- The GOP

More similar jokes here